Venezuelan beer.

More variety than Wal Mart.

well a very small, poorly stocked Wal Mart... in a dry county.

I recently had the pleasure of being a participant in a truly educational weekend. Friday night: a guide to the beers of Venezuela. Saturday night: a history of Rum. Before moving here I was made aware of some enlightening writing about living in Venezuela. The Blog is called Fino Cambur- cool banana, and you really should check it out. I attached the post I had first come across before moving here.

fino cambur beer review

As you can imagine- I was quite excited to be invited to the second showing of this beer tasting- having taken part in a few Colorado microbrew tastings I did consider myself somewhat an expert on beer. Well that is to say I really like beer.

We gathered up multiple cans of each of the countries finest-and here are the results:

So much good beer you just have to close your eyes to keep from getting too excited.

These are not faces that are exactly looking forward to drinking so much high quality beer.

Michael, Adam, Sean, and Nadjib were the returning veterans from the first years tasting- they had the grim look of men who knew they had a hard job ahead of them- like coal miners on an elevator. Mike Simpson and I were the fresh newcomers (conveniently not photographed) who after both coming from Qatar were quite frankly just happy to be at a table covered in beer cans.

If one didn't know any better one might say "hey one of those looks to be the color of pee" .
Sometimes it is good to not know any better.

The results: After each type the comments would pour forth and here is where this post really just wrote itself. I also included the Adam Fox litmus test.

1. Regional Lite aka- cerveza ligera (translated: beer of the liger). "this looks at home served in a porceline cup" " simian urine"                                              Adam: "I liked it"
2. Polar Lite- "oh- super watery- no discernable taste" "really no difference to regional" "it's like you took budweiser and added 8 cups of water"                  Adam: "I liked it"
3. Solera Lite- "better (of the lites) as it is the least offensive"   Adam: "Like it"
4. Polar Ice aka cerveza suave (translated beer that will make you appear to be very smooth)- "its fruitier" "delightful" "it gets me on the middle of the tongue" Adam- did not like it.              Authors note- at this point of the tasting we were still not swirling the beer and spitting it out- Michael wouldn't let us do that on his dining room floor. So we were drinking most of it (all of it)
5. Polar Pilsner -"smells skunky... tastes like shit" "it is a bit chewy" "almost made me puke"                                  Adam: "I did not like it"
6. Regional Pilsner- "funky" "mmmmm, unnnnh for the first 3 seconds then its dissapointing" "I kind of like this cause it actually has some flavor"                     Adam: "I like it"
7. Zulio- "its like sunshine in my mouth!" "favorite can" "the can makes my hand look massive" for the record- the zulio can is the best looking and smallest.             Adam: "liked it"
8. Solera- (green can) "hangover waiting to happen" "questionable foam"   Adam: "I love it- my go to beer!"
9. Polar Lite with Lupelo- purple can (we think this is beer mixed with energy drink) "it smells like a fart" "that is creamy, bubbly, and disgusting" "superflat" "don't swill it" "I feel like I have a furball"           Adam: "I might like it if it makes me dance all night"
10. Destillo- cerveza ultra premium- "it actually has flavor- isn't that amazing" " not urine colored" " I wouldn't have a session on that but I would drink 2-3 pints.... actually I would have a session on that"                       Adam: "Love it"

We also tried 2 other beers but as they were not Venezuelan I didn't include- overall consensus was varied but Zulio and Destillo were clear favorites. To sum up the whole experience MSR put it well: It's all relative. Quite true- if this is all you have available then this is what you drink- just don't expect me to be bringing any home to replace my Dales Pale Ale.- next post will be on the other half of the educational weekend- the rum tasting!

and what does one do with leftover crappy beer? that's right: beer pong.